To prove that you're worthy of one of his girls,
He'll test your skills and your pride,
As he innocently invites you to join the family
On horseback - Beware: this is THE RIDE!

Now I was a tenderfoot - the only horses I'd rode
Were under the hood of my car.
I had no desire to climb up on that beast,
But I had to, if I wanted to go far.

Snip was his name, a big horse was he,
The tallest one they happened to see.
With my six foot four frame on this horse you have
Everyone else a foot shorter than me!

Her dad didn't follow trails, he bushwhacked instead,
And off through the trees he would go.
He'd look back and grin and ask how I was,
On his face, an evil smile would show.

He'd search out a branch that he'd just barely clear,
Under which my big horse had to crawl.
Leaving me to ponder, just how the heck,
Do I get under that branch at all?

Do I lean back, with my feet up by his ears,
Exposing a rather sensitive place?
Or do I lean forward, duck under that branch,
Skinning my back, and scratching my face?

The first worked very poorly, although I tried hard,
At least I did not break the ranks.
Next I leaned forward and stretched back my legs,
Not knowing I'd kick old Snip right in the flanks!

He was off like a rocket, a streak through the woods,
As I swayed wildly from side to side.
A wild gallop past all, I lost one of the reins,
Both stirrups, and all of my pride!

Hanging on for dear life, I pulled on that rein,
Around in a circle Snip would go.
Up to a rock wall we came, he screeched to a halt,
I dove off and put on quite a show.

Somehow, I survived it, and passed the big test,
One hurdle was cleared, one barrier put aside.
So beware, you suitors of a rancher's daughter,
When her dad says, "Son, let's go for a ride!"